rain or shine...

...so glad you're mine.

That's the name given to this beautiful piece of hand-crafted, custom jewelry.  I told the hubs not to get me anything for Mother's Day until after the baby was born less than a week later because I wanted something with both of my babies' names on it.  Since we didn't know if it was a boy or a girl, he could hardly order the gift ahead of time.  I showed him several designs that I loved and this is the one he chose.  Turns out the sentiment behind it is absolutely and perfectly fitting.

I love everything about it.

lisa leonard designs

It really is true, isn't it?  Rain or shine.  Sickness and health.  Rich or poor.  I love my babies more than anything in the world. While the fun times are what I look forward to, nothing makes me feel more like a mom than the times when I am nurturing my sick child.  The times when he wants me and only me, as frustrating as that can be.  When you make the decision to bring a child into the world, you sign up for the best and the worst of times.  

You may fantasize about smelling that baby powder fresh head and forget about smelling like curdled milk because your baby threw up on every shirt that fits and you haven't had time to do laundry.  You may envision strangers coming up to you in the store and complimenting you on how well-behaved and adorable your toddler is, meanwhile not realizing that at some point, he will throw every single thing you feed him 10 feet from his high chair for a week straight.  But only after rubbing it in his hair.  You may picture slowly rocking him in that plush glider from Babies R Us and softly humming "Rock-a-Bye Baby," oblivious to the fact that, before long, the most annoying cartoon theme songs on the planet will be stuck in your head for days at a time.  

Rain or shine, I love my kids and I'm so glad they're mine.

hoping for sun,
~C~

viral

Tuesday I got a text from the babysitter and she said Theo had a slight temp and was acting a little whiny and clingy. Figures, because we had family photographs scheduled for that night. She said not to cancel our plans and that he'd be all set to go at our pre-discussed time.
I got there at 3:45 and by the time I arrived, he was insisting on being held and immediately started crying when he saw me, collapsing into my arms. I pulled out all the stops on the way home, trying to get him to smile. Nothin'.  I knew by the time we got home that pictures would be cancelled. We rescheduled for Thursday. I checked his temp and it was 99.0. Nothing too concerning. By about 8pm it was over 103 and he was totally miserable. He spent the whole night lying on us, crying, and drifting in and out of restless sleep.
He finally went to bed for the night at 10 and surprisingly slept through the night.  Theo woke up with a 100.9 temp, which went away with ibuprofen and never returned. He was happy and playful and seemed like himself again. I marveled at how quickly little bodies can heal themselves.
I was almost certain that the fever was from teething. It was obvious that he had some discomfort as he was chewing on his fingers and holding his cheek. It just wasn't adding up because every website I consulted said that teething never causes fevers that high. I also noticed that his appetite was nearly gone, which was concerning.
Thursday morning when he got up, I was rubbing his bare back and it felt bumpy.  His lower eyelids also looked red and he was really grumpy. It just wasn't sitting right with me so I talked to a couple people and they urged me to call the doctor in case it was something contagious that might spell trouble for Dexter. Sure enough, they wanted to see him to rule out a virus.
I took him in and the doctor looked and him and listened as I explained the events of the past couple days. He said the rash was too widespread to be sun-related and took one look at his throat before confirming that he did indeed have a virus. Dang.  What about our photo session?
Aside from still not eating much, he seemed to feel fine so I warned the photographer and we decided to meet a little earlier than originally planned in hopes that everything would pan out. I'm not sure how our session went, but it went.
I'm feeling a little smart and a little stupid all at the same time. My husband wasn't concerned and thought I was being overly paranoid. Okay, he didn't say that but I know he was thinking it!  So anyway, I'm glad I trusted my mommy instincts when they were telling me something wasn't right, but I feel like a moron for not having a clue that it was a virus. Heck, I don't know if I've ever had a virus. How am I supposed to know what they look like? 
Now we just have to make sure that Dexter doesn't get it. The doc said if he does get it, he'll have to be hospitalized. I hope it's not too late.
this is not a fun first,
~C~
 

recovering nicely

I don't know if I just got lucky, or if it really is easier the second time around. Maybe my body just remembered what to do and got better at it. Regardless, here I am, just shy of 3 weeks postpartum and I feel great. Almost like I didn't even have a baby. The misery of pregnancy is already a blur and a magical, sentimental hue has been cast over my memory of it. I rub Dexter's knees and elbows and feel their familiar pointy-ness and smile to myself... 
And I realize why people continue having subsequent children. There really is something spectacular about the whole thing...growing a perfect little miniature version of yourself inside your body, going from being pregnant to the mother of this little human in an instant, and then caring tirelessly for him day in and day out. I don't even mind the long nights and early mornings because I realize more than ever that each phase is just that...a fleeting moment in this tiny person's life. The more he wants to be with me/on me/attached to me, the better. I don't want this time in our lives to end.
So...maybe I'm a little sentimental, but other than that, I feel great emotionally. Last time, I remember being a bit of a mess. I think a lot of that had to do with having such a hard time breastfeeding. It really has been a breeze this time - I didn't think that was even possible. I didn't have the terrible night sweats this time that I had about a week after Theo was born. The hormones are in check, thank goodness.
Not to mention the calm confidence that comes with having the second baby. We know what to do this time. We know when to freak out and when to just take a deep breath.  We know he won't die or hate us if he has to cry for a minute until we can get to him. We know we won't break him.  We know he won't want to sit on our laps once he starts crawling. 
As far as sleep goes, I scoff at anyone who says you don't get any sleep when there's a newborn around. Have these people ever been pregnant?  I've never been more tired than I was when I was knocked up. Now, when it's time to go to sleep, you better believe I'm out like a light when my head hits that pillow.  I'll take newborn sleep over pregnant sleep any day.
My total weight gain for this pregnancy was 22 pounds and so far I've only lost 12 of that.  The good news is that I only have 10 to go! I'll take the blame there, because I know I've been indulging a little more than I should while assuming that nursing will remove any extra pounds eventually. I lost the majority of my weight between 3 and 6 months postpartum after Theo without really trying. I know that I need to get it under control so that Dexter is getting a good diet and so that I don't end up gaining any weight from here.
I have a snuggly little baby lying on my chest right now so I'm going to get back to what I do best...kissing his sweet head and enjoying this very moment.
mwah,
~C~